Friday, August 27, 2010

Life and other things that get in the way of sleep

So started on Copaxone shot about 2 weeks ago.  Really having a hrad time with wanting to take this one.  No immediate benefit.  Just a med that MAY help prevent new lesions and POSSIBLY lessen number of exacerbations.  Thats alot of ifs and maybes.  I have happened upon quite a few different instances where people have MS and were relatively OK for about 20 years then it started hitting them hard.  When these people started getting hit hard, they were in their 40s.  I wonder if the more destructive side of MS likes to show up around that age or after that many years. 
This concerns me because I am 38.  I just got my dx because of incompetent doctors and moving to a different state.  So will my slam come after 20 yrs of dx or around 40 if there really is one?
I am having more of a hard time with this than I figured.  I thought after I got the dx I would be relieved.  Now it seems I am just worried.  I stopped looking for more info...too much out there to read and it may or may not be applicable to me in some degree at sometime in the future.
Maybe, I can just pretend nothing is wrong and go back to work and help my family out more.
Maybe I would be able to pull this off for a few weeks, months, or years before my body slammed me back into reality.
Hey, I can have dreams cant I?

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